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Wednesday, May 5, 2010

Betrayal Dream....

Last night I had a dream and I woke feeling betrayed. In the past 6 months I have broken ties with several of my close friends I thought would always be there. I have had to morn the loss of their friendship and move on because I realized what cancer they brought to my life.
The dream I had that I woke up realizing I felt betrayed went like this:
My long lost friend Laura from childhood invites me and some of my friends as well as friends we have had since we were in grade school to London. We all fly there together on the long flight and set up in a kind of chic resort like hostel. Its not long and were all yacking away reminiscing on old times ect.. The time goes by, we play around the pool, do some activities together, it almost like we were at a summer camp, but I guess it could have been an all inclusive resort because they often have activities and do similar things. The betrayal part is coming.... So we were all going to get dressed up for something from what I understood. So I because I love this kind of thing and I will freely share and dress people up for fun, pull out every item of clothing I own to help everyone look there best. I walk in with my bag, pull it open and dump all the stuff on the floor. We all go through it, having fun dressing up, then we go out. I don't remember what happens between that and what happens next but this is where I felt betrayed and angry. We were all tired after a night on the town I guess because it seems I slept in. Everyone else though seemed to have woken up a little earlier than I had. So it occured to me they ,ust be by the pool and that I would liek to find my bathing suit to meet them there. So in looking for every one (and the rest of my bathing suit and the clothes I had dumped on the floor to get ready) I went into the next room where all my clothes had been played dress up with. Much to my chagrin, there was nothing to be found. The whole room was clean everything put away.
SIDE NOTE: 2 things: 1) I knew my friend Danielle had cleaned up because thats just what she would do. She is a very neat and organized person.
2)This is how dreams work you just never know what will be given to you as imagery... There was a very large tree growing in the middle of the room on occasion. Also the room would seem to expand and contract simultaneouesly depending on the situation. When the room would contract the tree would disappear.
OK so...My friend Danielle was the one staying in this room with a few other friends. So I peeked around in some of the droors there just looking to see if things had been put away by accident or something. As I looked around I remember getting more and more upset as I kept looking and looking and I couldn't find any single article I had left there. I called for Danielle she came and so did some of the other girls. I guess I asked her where my stuff was and she just laughed but gave no answer...which only made me more upset.Also because I was looking to get to the pool to meet the girls there as soon as possible, I didn't want to miss the fun! Finally in the far corner of the room underneath some blankets and other stuff I found my clothes.
SIDE NOTE: I wasn't naked this whole time. I think actually I was looking for my bathing suit to go to the pool. The girls who were at the pool are my friends from a long time ago, from grade school. Laura being one of them so I'm assuming in my dream they were not a part of this scheme to get one over on me.
Continuing... I was relieved to find my clothes but still pissed that they (guess there were a few others in on it but mainly one ring leader and one pawn) had played this trick on me. In my inner dream thoughts I remember thinking how I knew Nicole was the one who was behind this. That Danielle was a front for her scheming. In a way it was like Danielle's frame of reference for how she thought things were was stolen by and replaced with Nicole's.
The dream continued and I went to find the other girls I knew I trusted more than the one's who had played this mean trick on me. It was sad though because I really was looking for Laura above everyone else and all anyone could tell me was that she would be back. Since I was there though I told everyone what they had done and how I felt about it. I guess I was looking for them at least to be on my side.
The words/phrases I woke up thinking and wanting to look up in a dream dictionary were "hidden or misplaced clothing/personal items", "old friends", "betrayal", "angry", "sharing", "traveling", and "tree".
I really do feel this way. The events of the past have made me distrust people I felt I would never have to question. Mostly the dream is noteworthy because of the fact that the feelings have manifested themselves in this way.Dreams are great even still because they act as a mode to help me work out these feelings. They also point out how I have not completely dealt with these feelings of anger and confusion.

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